Monday, August 31, 2009

The Anti Eye Candy

Will someone please explain to me what the big deal is about Robert Pattinson?

I know all you Twilighter's are gasping and clutching your hearts at my blasphemy but honestly...have you taken a good look at him? He's just nasty. You can practically see the grease dripping off him. Ew. But somehow he is getting mobbed in the streets like he's freaking David Beckham or something. Seriously?

I just don't see it.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Ooh that dress so scandalous....

Recognize that song lyric?

Sisqo's Thong Song just came on my iPod. I many fond memories of shaking my tail feathers to that song at every single college dance a decade ago. I am ashamed to admit I still know every word and sang them out loud while I booty danced around the bedroom.

Sad but true, folks. Sad but true.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Road Warrior

Dear Fellow Commuters,

I know that I'm the new girl around here and I don't have a lot of experience with this whole commuting thing, but I'm pretty sure I have a competent grasp of the basics. It seems, however, that most of you could use a refresher.

1. There is this thing on the left hand side of your steering wheel called a Turn Signal. It is used to indicate an intention to switch lanes. You ought to try it sometime.
2. The interstate is not the appropriate place for doing your hair, applying your makeup or changing your shirt (or your pants, for that matter). Please pay attention to the road.
3. Mr. NosePicker, you are surrounded by windows. I can see you and so can every other car that passes you.
4. The left hand lane is for people with no intention of exiting within the next five miles. If this is not you, kindly move yourself to at least the middle lane.
5. Short of a vehicular accident blocking all three lanes, there is absolutely ZERO reason that we should be at a complete standstill at any point while on the interstate. This is the INTERSTATE, people - it was invented for the express purpose of avoiding the stop and go of traffic lights. Even if we are moving slowly, we should be MOVING at all times.

In return, I promise to keep my middle finger to myself and do my best to refrain from screaming obscenities at you idiots my fellow road warriors.


Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Never let a bad day get you down

I have a confession. Couch to 5k hit a bit of a snag last week. I am majorly bummed but determined not to let it sidetrack me!

I swore up and down that I would run at least once while I was in Florida last weekend. I even gave up coveted carry-on space to pack my running shoes, only to arrive in the middle of the first tropical storm of the season! It rained off and on all three days that I was there. And then I returned to Indy to find more of the same - three straight days of rain!!

So it was a full week before I got to run and I'd missed two training days of Week 6. My first day back was a run 4 minutes, walk 1 minute day - which I'd completed successfully twice the week before. I even added distance the second time I did it! I was so proud! But the first day back was a different story - I only completed 2 rotations before I started having chest pains. I ended up taking a huge break smack in the middle and walked for five minutes while they subsided. I have random chest pain every once in awhile, but they usually aren't brought on by exercise, so it totally threw me off my game. I was eventually able to run for a third set of 4 minutes but that was it. I was so disappointed in my abysmal performance, I came home and did Level 3 of The Shred as penance!

Needless to say, I was not very excited to run again on Sunday. I was worried about the chest pains coming back and irritated that I'd manage to lose progress in just a week. I'd been thisclose to enjoying my jogs and now I was actually less enthused than when I started this whole thing! I decided to stick with Week 6 since I'd performed so dismally the first time through it. I did a 4/1 training day and completed it without incident, although I definitely noticed I was slower than before.

Today I stepped things up to a 5 minute run and a 2 minute walk. It went better than I expected, although I found myself glancing at the ipod a lot to see how much time is left. It's sad, but I motivate myself by counting down how much longer I have in each little rotation - half way done! only 2 more minutes! only 1.5 more minutes! only 1 more minute! Pathetic, I know. But hey, whatever gets me through, right?

Monday, August 24, 2009


First day done!

It was long, but very good. Everyone was excited for me to join the team. I had a steady stream of well wishers all day and even met the founder of the company when he wandered by.

The office is just ridiculous. They just moved in six weeks ago. It is huge and very modern. Brand new furniture, ergonomic chairs, a gym and a fully stocked kitchen - a Keurig coffee maker and ice cream in the freezers for that afternoon energy boost. How awesome is that?

I was most worried about the other girl in my department - would she be cool? would we get along? I shouldn't have worried!! She seems super cool and made me feel very welcome. And she complimented my shoes within minutes of my arrival - that's my kind of girl!

And the puppies survived their day alone. The dog walker said they were well-behaved and they were beside themselves with excitement to see me. There's nothing better to come home to at the end of a long day!

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Jitter Bug

I'm down to my last few hours of freedom before I return to work full-time tomorrow. And I must admit, I'm a total stress ball.

It's kind of like the first day of elementary school. You have no idea what to expect. Will you like your boss? Will you like your coworkers? Will they like you? Will you like the job? Will you be able to find the bathroom when necessary? Will you be dressed appropriately?

There are all the questions about how this will affect my life in general - how will I adjust to the commute? How will I find time to work out and run? Will I be able to get the housework done? How in the world will I make time for everything I need to get done? Will the puppies hate me for abandoning them for hours on end?

And most surprisingly, I'm sad. Sure, I'm thrilled to finally have a job. To be a productive member of society again. But I'm also kind of sad to see my unemployment end. I mean, when else will I get the opportunity to do whatever the heck I want for weeks on end? The funny part is, I was so worried about finding a job and not spending money, that I couldn't fully enjoy the time off. And now that I have a job and money to once again spend as I please, I'll have no time to enjoy it! It's a nasty Catch-22.

I'm also sad to see my time as a telecommuter really truly come to an end. I know it's been five months since I lost my job, but I kind of kept expecting Ashton Kutcher to jump out from some bush and tell me I've been punked. The company didn't fold and my job is still right where I left it - won't I pretty please come back? I guess that just speaks to how much I loved my old job, my boss, my employees and the perks of being a telecommuter. I'd go back in a heartbeat, if I could.

I know tomorrow the thrill of the new challenge will rush in and I'll be fine. I'm excited about the challenges and opportunities at the new company. I'm excited about meeting new people and flexing my work muscles again. And I'm excited about dressing up for the office (because we all know, everything comes back to the clothes!). Whenever I start to lose focus, I'll just hold onto these things. That...and the promise of a good glass of wine at the end of a long and hopefully productive day!

Saturday, August 22, 2009


Guess what ridiculously yummy chocolatier now has a customer loyalty reward program?

After dinner last night, I cajoled Nate into letting me pop into the Godiva store at the nearby mall. I'm rarely in that part of town so a stop at my favorite chocolate store is a super special treat.

I picked out half a dozen truffles (vanilla, raspberry, key lime, cacao and 2 cappuccino's, for those who are curious) and was ready to go on my blissfully happy way, when the heavens opened and a choir of angels raised a joyful 'Hallelujah'.

Um, well, okay. Maybe that didn't actually happen, but it might as well have.

Godiva now has a Customer Loyalty Program! And it's seriously the best one I've ever seen!

Free chocolate of your choice every. single. month. Just for coming in. No purchase minimum, no coupon required. Just show up with your Loyalty Card and TADA! Free chocolate.

And if that's not enough, if you spend $10 on any visit, you get another free gift. Hello?! Who can go to Godiva and spend less than $10? Not this gal! Monthly truffles, here I come!

I'm seeing a lot more visits to that part of town in my future....

Thursday, August 20, 2009

If you didn't know me better, you'd think I made this stuff up

The rather colorful history of my Dog Grooming adventures has been well-documented here at Unwrap Life. Last time I swore up and down that I had learned my lesson - nothing but on-site grooming for us from now on.

Um, yeah. About that...

In an attempt to bring order to my entire universe before returning to full-time work next week, I am on a full-scale cleaning binge, which apparently includes cleaning the furbabies. Sadly for me and my procrastinating ways last minute planning, the only mobile doggy salon I found doesn't have any openings until well into next week.

Which of course, means a trip to the puppy wonderland otherwise known as PetSmart, where lazy puppy mommies everywhere can get a last minute appointment for the privilege of paying ridiculous sums of money to have their furry devils darlings brushed, buffed and blow-dried.

We made it into the car without the spilling of blood or crushing of ribs and made our way to PetSmart in one piece. Leashes on and out into the parking lot we went - where Lola promptly wrapped her leash around Oliver's leg, halting all forward progress.

I put a foot on the handle of each dog's leash as I crouched down to free him. BIG MISTAKE. Lola saw her opportunity and bolted, taking a mad dash across the parking lot, leash dragging noisily behind her. I, being terrified that she is going to be hit by a car, give chase. Which apparently only encouraged her, as this is a super fun game! Poor Oliver is trying gamely to keep up as I run through the parking lot, alternately screaming and begging Lola to 'COME NOW!'. There was one particularly ugly moment where I actually managed to step on her leash, only to have it fly out from under me and nearly topple me into the very nice man who stopped to help the crazy lady. Embarrassing much?

I eventually caught her, beat the living daily lights out of her and then watched as she pranced prettily into PetSmart as if the raving lunatic in the parking lot had not the slightest thing in the world to do with her.

She's lucky she's so darn cute or she'd be so dead by now.

Saturday, August 15, 2009


It's silly and kind of pathetic to admit but six years post-college, I still get a little nostalgic every fall as the kiddies move into dorms, twitter about class schedules, who's rooming with whom and who broke up or made up over the summer. It's worse than ever this year, as my baby sister embarks on her freshman year at a big ol' Southern university not too far from my own alma mater. I was so sad not to be there for move-in day but I made up for it by boring her to death imparting hours of sage wisdom on making the most out of her college experience: Take lots of pictures, say yes to new experiences, befriend someone you'd never talk to in high school, take advantage of every 'skip' the professor gives you.

Of course, being the sappy girl that I am, I dragged out all my college scrapbooks and fondly relived those four years multiple times over the last week with visions of a sweet memory post in my head. But I quickly realized there are FAR too many memories to ever fit into a single post. Heck, I could start a whole new blog and post about college adventures for a year straight and not run out. And I was struck anew with an appreciation for those four years of my life. I love my grown-up life for sure, but I think I will always be just a little bit sad every fall, remembering the people, experiences and adventures that made me the adult that I am today. And now I'm okay with that.

If you need me, I'll be the couch with a glass of wine and a pile of scrapbooks, making a list for my baby sis.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Ever have one of those days....

....when the dog takes off after a rabbit and you must chase her through the neighborhood. Barefoot. In a skirt?

....when you spend 20 minutes tearing your desk apart looking for a file, only to discover you put it exactly where it was supposed to go?

...when you're already running late and you get all the way back to the car, keys in ignition, only to realize you left your purchase sitting at the cash register?

...when you get through the entire crazy day and realize that you've been wearing two different earrings.ALL.DAY.LONG?

Yeah, that kind of day never happens to me either.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Couch to 5K

I have a little confession to make. I've been keeping a bit of a secret from you.

Now before you start dreaming in pink and blue, it's not that kind of secret. Sorry.

A few weeks ago I was out with some girlfriends and the conversation turned to working out. This was in the midst of my Shred workout and I was trying to figure out how to keep my momentum going after my 30 day Shred was over. We were tossing around ideas and before I knew it - BAM! - I'd agreed to run a 5k in November.

Say what?!

Those who know me IRL are laughing out loud right about now. It's okay. Admit it. The idea of me running anything is laughable.

I hate to run. Loathe it. Despise it. I'd rather go a month without shopping than run around the block. That's some serious hate, ya'll.

But oddly enough, every few years I get the urge to 'become a runner'. The first time was the summer that Nate and I started dating. Trying to be a good girlfriend, I agreed to go running with him. I was young and in shape (enough), surely a mile or two would be do-able, right? Wrong. Half a mile in, I was huffing and puffing like a two-pack-a-day smoker while Nate literally ran circles around me as we jogged at a snails pace. Three quarters of a mile in, I waved the white flag and walked to the cafeteria where I drowned my embarrassment in soft-serve ice-cream.

The most recent time was two years ago when we moved to an apartment with a gym, complete with nice big treadmills on which to run indoors. Had to be easier than running outside, right? Wrong. Half a mile in, I was bored out of my mind. Why do people do this? This is so not fun. How do they make the time go by? I know! They get in the 'zone'. I'll close my eyes and find my zone! Twenty seconds later, I was no longer running upright on the treadmill. Note to self: Real runners do not close their eyes while on the treadmill.

Clearly my, uh, track record with running leaves a lot to be desired. But as Nate has gotten more into competitive running lately, I've found myself once again fighting the urge to pound the pave. So when my friend Jamie mentioned that she was starting a program to teach herself to run, I found myself not only asking to join her but suggesting this....

Before the night was over, we'd agreed to run the Indianapolis 5K Turkey Trot together this Thanksgiving. And just so I wouldn't chicken out, I talked about it to anyone who would listen while we were on vacation. Nothing like public humiliation to get a girl motivated!

The program starts out slow - nothing but walking for the first two weeks. Then it slowly starts building your running time and then once you are comfortable running, it builds your distance up so that by the end of 8 weeks, you're running 3.2 miles.

The first two weeks were easy, peasy - just walking longer and longer distances. The hardest part was making the time and finding the motivation to do it. Quite honestly, that's why I didn't mention it here earlier. I was afraid I'd just get bored and move on to something else. But doing this with a friend has made all the difference! We don't actually train together, but we text, email or talk each running day to see how it went and to keep each other accountable. Knowing she's going to ask how it went is just the kick in the pants I need to get out there and do it.

I'm going into week 5 today. My runs are now more running than walking and I dare say, I am kind of starting to enjoy it a teeny tiny bit. It still sucks to be all sweaty and sucking wind and I run as slow as molasses, but I feel a huge sense of accomplishment when I get done. I'm not to the point yet where I want to go out and run, but I don't completely dread it anymore either. That's progress, right?

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Ugly in The City

{image via fug girls}

Seriously, Whitney Port? You live in New York City, work for Diane von Furstenburg, and basically get paid just to live your life, and this is how you choose to leave the house? Do you not own a mirror? Or have a girlfriend who will tell you that you look like a bad '80's flashback? The fashion world may be able to resurrect big shoulder pads and even neon, but I don't think anyone north of 12 years old will go for the t-shirt-tied-in-a-knot look again. Now please step away from the mom-shorts before you hurt yourself or someone else.....

Friday, August 7, 2009

And they wonder why her mommy drinks

Guess who was quite a pill at the vet today? Someone wouldn't sit still for her blood draw and instead bled all over her lovely white fur. But if she has to wear a band-aid, at least she's doing it fashionably.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Dear John All My Children

{image via tv fanatic}

Dear All My Children,

It was with great regret and a heavy remote that I removed you from my DVR line up this afternoon. As I fast-forwarded watched today's show, I realized that after 20 years of committed fan-dom, I'm just not that into you anymore. I didn't think it was possible to make a soap opera boring, but congratulations, AMC, you have done the impossible. I no longer give a flying leap who killed Stuart, why Emma won't speak, or whether Kendall will end up with Zach or Ryan.

Farewell, All My Children. Perhaps one day you'll find a way to bring yourself back from the dead.


Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Signed, Sealed, Delivered

We've got some exciting news here at Casa Carrington.

not pregnant. sorry.keep scrolling.

I've been busting to share the news since I got the offer a week ago, but I had to tell the boss at my part-time gig first. It's officially official - offer is signed, sealed and delivered to my brand new company.

Six months after I found out I was losing my job, four months since I've actually been unemployed, hundreds of resumes, dozens of cover letter revisions, one ridiculously lame job fair and only two interviews, I am finally back in the full-time game. And you want to hear the funny part? I didn't even apply for the job!

That's right, they found me. Called me out of the blue to ask if I was interested in a job. Everyone keeps asking how they got my resume, but to be honest, I really don't care. I like to think God just dropped this job from the sky straight into my lap. And let's just say, He made it worth the wait.

I honestly didn't realize just how much I was missing my old job until I got into the interview and started talking 'business' again. It was like a little piece of me came alive inside. I walked out of that interview (2.5 hours, ya'll!) happier than I've been in months - I felt all lit up inside!

The job is in Purchasing but in a totally different industry than I was in before. It's a little daunting to think about learning a whole new industry, but I love a good challenge and this one will definitely be a doozy. They were actually very interested in me because I come from a different industry - the VP told me he expects me to 'shake things up' in a big way. How's that for a little motivation right out of the gate?

So now I'm wrapping up my last few days at the part-time job, plotting how to get the most out of my last few days as a Lady of Leisure and preparing to start a whole new adventure. One that I hope will be worth the wait.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Puppy Mommy FAIL

These two had a vet appointment today at 3:00pm.

I remembered said appointment at 5:00pm.

Puppy Mommy FAIL.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

The Time Traveler's Wife

{image via reelmovienews}

Has anyone read The Time Traveler's Wife? I've heard great things about the book and plan to see the movie when it comes out in two weeks (Rachel McAdams is a personal favorite!), but I really wanted to read the book first. Sadly, I'm still number 39 on the waiting list at the library. At two weeks per person, I should get the book sometime in December 2010.

So if you've read it, is it worth $19.95 to buy it? Or if you own it, could we work out a little book swap? Pretty please?

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Now that's amore

{image via}

Tonight we are going out to a new Brazilian restaurant in downtown Indy. They cook meat on these huge skewers and then bring the entire thing to your table and cut the meat directly off the skewer onto your plate. Sounds romantic, huh? Or not. But our neighbors have been raving about how fabulous it is for months and Nate is dying to give it a try.

Me? Not so much. You see, the last time we went to a Brazilian restaurant was in the Mayan Riviera on our honeymoon six years ago. The food was delicious - until it came back up later that night. Over and over and over again. I got major food poisoning from that place. On my honeymoon. The night before we were supposed to go on our $300 'adventure' outing.

So I don't exactly have fond memories of Brazilian restaurants. But I do have fond memories of my husband and his utter delight and ecstasy at an all-you-can-eat buffet. So I will enjoy their salad bar to the fullest and try not to vomit in my mouth at the sight of every meat skewer that comes by.

Here's hoping tonight goes a little better than the last time.
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