Tuesdays at the Table

It seems kind of ridiculous for me to participate this week, seeing as how I have managed to avoid cooking dinner for the last five evenings. Perhaps I should write a post about my ingenious ability to shirk kitchen duty....

The moment I imagine you have all been waiting for since last Tuesday's amazingly yummy post....drum roll, please....

What's that? The drum roll is too much? You haven't been waiting with bated breath for today's installment?

Ahem, well. This is embarrassing. I must hide my face in shame now. I am pretty sure I am too mortified to cook dinner tonight. (See how I did that there? Cue Night #6 with no kitchen slave labor!)

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Beef and Cucumber Stir-fry

Ingredients:
1 pound beef steak (sirloin, top loin or rump)
2 tablespoons honey2 tablespoons soy sauce
1/4 teaspoon chili powder
1 cucumber
1 red bell pepper (if you don’t like red bell pepper, substitute snow peas)
4 scallions
3 garlic cloves
2 tablespoons oil

Directions:

Slice the beef into strips ¼ inch wide and 3 inches long, trimming away all the fat.

In a large bowl, mix the honey, soy sauce and chili powder. Add the beef strips and stir. Set aside while preparing vegetables.

Peel the cucumber and slice lengthwise. Scrape out and discard the seeds. Cut into strip ¼ inch wide and 2 inches long. Wash the bell pepper and cut it in half. Remove and discard the stem and seeds. Then slice the pepper into strips ¼ inch wide and 2 inches long. Wash the scallions. Cut of the root tips and top 2 inches of the green ends and discard them. Cut the remaining white and green parts into ½ inch pieces. Peel and finely chop the garlic. Set the vegetables aside.

Heat 1 tablespoon of the oil in a wok or frying pan over high heat. Remove the steak strips from the bowl, keeping any remaining liquid (marinade) in the bowl, and add the steak to the wok. Stir-fry for 1 minute. When the meat is no longer pink, return to the bowl containing the marinade.

Wipe out the wok so that any remaining honey does not burn. Heat the remaining oil in the wok over high heat and stir-fry cucumber, bell pepper, scallions and garlic for about 2 minutes, or until the vegetables just begin to soften. They should stay fairly crisp. Quickly return the steak and any remaining marinade to the wok and heat for 1 minute, or just until the steak gets hot and the liquid boils. Serve over rice.

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I got this super easy recipe from a cookbook my grandmother gave me at a wedding shower. It's called Help! My Apartment has a Kitchen! Too funny, right? And so totally me.

The (Short) Story of Us

The lovely Cole from All the Small Stuff has bestowed upon me the Honest Scrap Award. Thanks, girl!

I must list 10 honest things about myself. But I talk about myself a lot here already, so in honor of the ninth anniversary of our first date (!), I am going to let you in on 10 honest things about my love and I.

1. No, I am not that girl. You know, the one who remembers and celebrates every.single.tiny anniversary. (We've been together 9 years. We barely celebrate the actual anniversary. ) It's more like I have a lot of time on my hands and was looking through old scrapbooks while I was organizing. Made me a little nostalgic.

2. We met at an assembly on my first day at college. I vividly recall every detail of that day. He'd been there two weeks already which might explain why he has absolutely no memory of meeting me that day.

3. We had a class together that first semester but I didn't start crushing on him until around Thanksgiving. He broke my heart when he came back from Christmas break with a girlfriend.

4. While he was dating said girlfriend and I was secretly pining away for him, he tried to set me up with his best friend. This did not go over well.

5. I basically begged him to go on our first date. He asked me to the Spring Fling at 2:00am the morning of the dance. Desperate much? (For the record, I had never behaved that way over a boy in my life.)

6. I managed to fall asleep in the car on the way home from the much longed for first date. He kissed me goodnight anyway.

7. The proposal two years later involved another school dance, a Secret Society, poison ivy, a midnight walk in the winter woods and 2,000 twinkling Christmas lights.

8. We took our vows very seriously. Especially that little 'in sickness or health' bit. Nate got sick at the wedding reception and I got food poisoning on the honeymoon. Love me, love my stomach ailments.

9. Nate has a habit of bestowing nicknames on his nearest and dearest. I got mine second semester of college. Nine years later, it still gives me a little thrill to hear him say it.

10. I love to watch Nate play soccer. I spent many Saturday afternoons cheering him on in college and watching him play now always brings back good memories. It doesn't hurt that he looks damn sexy in soccer shorts. I swoon.

Waste o' my time

Today is the one-month 'anniversary' of my unemployment. So to 'celebrate' I went to a job fair downtown today. It's been advertised all over the radio, the newspaper and CareerBuilder for weeks, so I pre-registered, printed up my resume and made the 45 minute drive down there.

Job fairs are not what they used to be.

In case you have not had the privilege of attending one recently, here is a little guide to the new world of job fairs:

1. It is now acceptable to not shower before attending a job fair.
2. Good news! Bare midriffs are no longer taboo! Just make sure to wear your blingest belly button ring.
3. Double points if you show muffin top while sporting a midriff baring shirt and belly ring.
4. Baseball caps, spaghetti straps, and cargo shorts are all totally acceptable interview attire.
5. Can't find a babysitter? No problem! Bring the little one along. Nothing says 'dependable' like someone who can't find childcare for a 3-hour job fair.

I have never seen anything like it in my life. Over 2/3 of the companies advertised didn't even show up. There were a grand total of 7 'companies' represented - two of them were military recruiters, two were universities trolling for students, Pampered Chef advertising 'own your own business' crap, one staffing agency and one actual honest-to-goodness company.

I stood in line for 45 minutes to sign my name and check a box that said I pre-registered online. Um, hello? What was the point of registering then?

Then I stood in line another 45 minutes to talk to the one company actual company with a booth. All for this:

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Recruiter: You have a good resume here. You would qualify for job #343. You can apply for it online.

Me: I've been watching your website for a few months. What is the title for job #343?

Recruiter: Contract specialist. Just watch for it online and then apply.

Me: I've done that half a dozen times in the last three months. Any suggestions for actually getting an interview?

Recruiter: Not really. Just apply online.

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Seriously?

Butt Hole....or why I just don't understand men

After five years of marriage, I have learned that there are many fundamental differences in the way men and women think:

1. No matter how old they get, men will always think burping, farting and other bodily noises are hilarious.
2. His idea of helping with dinner involves moving the take out from a plastic wrapper to an actual plate.
3. A man will never learn how to load the dishwasher, no matter how many times you show him.
4. A man will never understand why you do not consider it fun to play video games with him. You will never get 'better at it' so long as he continues to shoot you in the back as you are running away unarmed.

These few things I know. This is the thing that continues to baffle and amaze me:

I walked into the bedroom the other night to see a fist-size hole in the back of Nate's boxer shorts. He is actually wearing them around the bedroom like this.

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Me: You putting on a little peepshow for me?

Him: What are you talking about?

Me: There is a hole the size of the Grand Canyon in your boxer shorts.

Him: Oh.

He continues to get ready for bed as if the whole conversation never happened...

Me: Um, aren't you going to change?

Him: Why?

Me: You can't possibly wear those to bed.

Him: Why not?

Me: Hello? Your entire left cheek is hanging out!

Him: Who cares?

Me: Seriously? You're going to keep wearing those?

Him: (staring at me blankly like I have lost my mind)

Me: No. I can't sleep knowing you're wearing those. Please throw them away.

He heads towards the closet and I head to the shower. Five minutes later, I emerge, noting happily that he has indeed changed shorts and I am victorious....for about 30 seconds, until I spy the nasty, ratty, hole-y shorts on the top of the dirty clothes pile.

Me: Oh, no you didn't.

Him (all innocent): What?

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What is it with men and their complete inability to judge when clothes are no longer appropriate to wear? Socks with holes, underwear with holes, t-shirts with holes. It's not as though you can't buy them 5 for $10 at Wal-mart. Heck, he doesn't even have to buy them! All he has to say is, "Honey, I need new boxer shorts." and they magically appear in his drawer by the weekend. What's so freaking hard about that?

I just don't understand. Men.

Ain't life funny

So the job interview yesterday went well...I think. It's always so dang hard to tell. Sigh.

There were two people interviewing me at once, so that added a little bit of challenge, trying to make eye contact with both of them equally. My biggest challenge in this whole job search is making sure I talk myself up enough. I always feel so self-conscious saying how great I am, but I know that's the only way I'm going to get anywhere. I had to rate myself on a bunch of characteristics (time management, volunteer management, creativity, productivity, etc). That is like the worst thing you could do to me in an interview. I'm good at all that stuff but I feel like I can't give myself 10's on everything. But on the flip side, if I didn't rock the skill set you need, then I wouldn't be sitting here interviewing with you, would I?

I need to just STEP AWAY from obsessively replaying that hour in my head and trust that God has a plan. So I wait.

And whilst I am waiting on that, I am also waiting on a new possibility! I got a call from a recruiter while I was in my interview. Hello?! Anyone else see the irony in that? I've been unemployed for four weeks. 28 days. 672 hours. And the recruiter picks the one hour when I have a job interview to call me. Life's funny like that.

Anyway, I had a good talk with him. He is looking for a buyer for a national company based here in Indy. He had 168 applications for the position - insane, right? But guess who is his first submission for the job? Did you guess moi? Ding, ding, ding! You got it. He said some very complimentary things about my cover letter, so even if nothing else comes of it, at least I got a little boost to my confidence. He forwarded my deets to the hiring manager and now I just wait to see if they call for an interview.

Wait. Cross fingers. Wait. Check email. Wait. Say a prayer. Wait. Obsess over interview. Wait. Check voicemail. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Blech.

U-G-L-Y...you ain't got no alibi....

...you UGLY....you UGLY....

{image via Baker's Shoes}

I mean, seriously, who's supposed to wear these? A cross-dressing Bozo the Clown?

Baby Birdie Mama Drama

Notice anything new at our house?


Look carefully. One of these windows is not like the others. See it now?

We have a bird's nest in our window! At first I was horrified when I rolled up last week to discover a pile of crap on the upstairs window ledge. But upon further inspection, I saw it was a tiny bird's nest, perfectly round and perched precariously on the narrow ledge. It was so beautiful that I didn't have the heart to knock it off and destroy it.

It sat empty all weekend and I was sure the birds had upgraded to a birdie condo in some nearby bush. But lo and behold, this morning Birdie Mama was sitting on her nest, all plump and smug like she owned the joint.


If you look closely you can kind of see her head above the nest. I keep trying to sneak up on her from inside the house but no dice. She must already be a mama cuz she's obviously got eyes in the back of her head!

There are four little blue eggs in the nest! So cute!


I wonder how long it will take them to hatch? And how the heck will four baby birds fit in that teeny, tiny nest?

To Be Continued....

Rikki Tikki Techie

{image via racineweb}

We've had a little makeover here at Unwrap Life, so if you're reading through Google Reader, click on through to check out my new Three Column Layout. It took a little trial and error but I finally figured out how to add the third column.

I've added a new goal to my Unemployment To Do list: learn HTML coding. I've picked up a little bit here and there over the last few months but I'd really like to learn how to do my own layouts and buttons. It would also be a marketable skill I could add to my resume.

Do any of you know HTML coding basics? Have any good websites or tutorials you've used to teach yourself?

Tuesdays at the Table

Sadly, my current condition makes it impossible for me to bend down and unearth my sorely neglected cookbooks from the bottom shelf of a kitchen cabinet so my options for this post are limited to the few two recipes that I can remember off the top of my head. Seeing as how you have already seen my favorite one, here is the other one.

This recipe holds some very strange and mixed memories for me. I learned it from an aunt (by marriage) who definitely had a few screws loose. Let's just say that this recipe is one of the very few happy memories I have of her time with the family.

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Burrito Bake

Ingredients:
Ground beef
Taco seasoning
Tortillas
1 can cream of mushroom soup
3/4 cup sour cream
1 package cheddar cheese or mexican cheese


Instructions:
Preheat oven to 350. Grease 9x13 baking pan.
Brown and drain ground beef. Add taco seasoning according to package instructions.
Spoon ground beef into tortilla shells. Roll tortillas and place in baking pan.
In a small bowl, mix the cream of mushroom soup and sour cream. Pour over tortillas in pan.
Sprinkle with cheese.
Bake for 20 or 30 minutes, or until cheese is melted.

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This is one of my favorite meals. Although the whole thing takes about an hour, you only actually have to cook for 20 minutes. I usually serve with refried beans for a yummy mexican themed meal.

Make sure to check out today's other yummy recipes at My Chihuahua Bites.

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

I've got all kinds of randomness floating around in my head today. Guess that's what very little sleep, a truckload of Aleve, and 36 straight hours of captivity on the couch will do to you.

So here are my thoughts in all their random, drug-induced glory.

1. The Good - I have a job interview! Woot, woot! It's a part-time marketing assistant position. I struggled a bit with whether or not to apply for something that was only part-time and requires a huge pay cut, but in the end it sounds like a really fun, interesting job so I went for it. Keep your fingers crossed for me on Thursday.

2. The Bad - I woke up yesterday in some major pain. I had a back injury four years ago that knocked me flat on my butt (literally) and required three weeks in a back brace and months of chiropractic care. I've gone nearly two years without a flare up but it appears my good luck has run out. I have been laying around on the couch with my heating pad for nearly two full days know but I still can't stand up straight. Moving from standing to sitting or sitting to laying is the worst. The chiro can't get me in until tomorrow so I am stuck like this for at least another day. I've seriously been considering this as an option for the better part of the afternoon:


3. The Ugly - To keep myself entertained I have been catching up on all the blog reading and random internet surfing that I missed last week while my sister was in town.

Wonder how many hours it took to put Lady Gaga in these hideous, skankalicious boots?

{image via perezhilton}

Prayers for Stellan

{image via Stellan's Name Gallery}

I know you've all heard me mention this sweet little guy before, but tonight and tomorrow he needs our prayers more than ever. Baby Stellan is scheduled for a very risky heart operation tomorrow (Tuesday) at 8:30am EST. Things this evening are not going well and his surgery may be moved up even sooner if they can't get his heart rhythms under control soon.

Would you pray with me for sweet baby Stellan? Pray specifically that:

1. The Great Physician will guide his earthly physician's hands.
2. No new issues as a result of the surgery. The list of possible complications is long and scary.
3. Peace for Stellan's mom, who is in Boston with him, and for his dad, who is at home with the family's other small children.
4. That God would be glorified in whatever the outcome may be.

If you've ever wondered if a single life can truly make an impact on the world, go spend some time at MckMama's blog. Even at a time when no one could fault her for screaming and railing at God, this woman still manages to put us all towards Him who can do immeasurably more than we could ever think or imagine.

Vanity, you are a cruel mistress ......or the things we do for sisters

{image via the brow stop}

If you ever hear me talk about getting threaded again, please remind me that it feels like death by a thousand facial paper cuts.

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I will freely admit that I have let some things go a bit since I began working from home two years ago. I don't wear make up every day, I am the queen of the messy ponytail, and I have a ridiculously large collection of yoga pants for someone who has only done yoga maybe twice in her entire life.

Since moving into the new house, I have neglected to hang my magnifying beauty mirror in the bathroom, in part because I loathe putting holes in my lovely virgin walls, but mostly I avoid it out of self-preservation. Magnifying mirrors were clearly invented by a man, because no woman in her right mind would have created an instrument whose sole purpose is to point out every new crow's foot, random mole hairs and pores the size of the Grand Canyon.

As a result of my efforts to deny the aging process going on all over my face, my usually well maintained eyebrows have suffered tremendously. I simply do not have the patience to lean over the sink each morning while squinting (hello, crow's feet!) owlishly with tweezers in hand.

I made the mistake of mentioning this to my sister on her first night here, casually dropping that I was considering 'threading' to get my caterpillars brows back under control. Mind you, I have been 'considering' this for several months, passing the brow place every time I visit the mall (read: often). But I know from past experience just how painful it is, so 'considering' was as far as I'd made it.

Bad move - she thought it was a great idea! A new experience! Fun sister bonding! Note to self: In the future, keep your big fat mouth shut.

And so we went on Thursday for a little self-induced torture landscaping. Eye brow threading is an ancient Indian beauty ritual where the technician uses thread to pluck, shape and thin your brows. It is really amazing to watch, faster than plucking and more accurate than waxing. Unfortunately it hurts so bad you want to slap your mama. Suddenly that magnifying mirror's not looking so bad....

I will admit, though, my brows do look better than they have in months and it was indeed fun sister bonding. Especially when her torture took twice as long. Serves her right!

Mimosa, anyone?

Having company is a good excuse for drinking in the morning.

Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love ya, tomorrow....

You're only a day away!

I used to sing that song (from the musical Annie) every April 14. Well, I guess technically, I still sing it every year on April 14. Good memories there.

In honor of the twenty-eighth anniversary of my magnificent birth a few good companies are giving away some freebies. Wait, wha? The freebies aren't because of my birthday? It's Tax day? Who wants to celebrate that?

Well then, in celebration of Tax Day, these companies are giving you poor working folks a break. Those of us who loaf around on our arses all day, well, we get 'em too, probably before you since we don't have to work until 5pm. Don't hate, you know you're jealous.

All deals are for Wednesday, April 15th only.

Totally Free Stuff:

Cinnabon - Free Cinnabon bites from 5-8pm.
Maggie Moo's Ice Cream - Free scoop of ice cream all day! They are calling 'E-cone-nomics'. Cute, right?
HydroMassage - Free massage all day but you need to make an appointment.


Rebate Stuff:
PF Chang's - One of my all time favorite restaurants is giving 15% off your bill.
TGI Friday's - Spend $15-$25 and receive a $5 gift card. Spend more than $25 and get a $10 gift card.
Chick-fil-a - Now this one I am not for sure is true but I read it a couple of different places, so I am hedging a bet that it's true. Make any purchase on April 15, then bring back the receipt any time during the rest of April and get the exact same meal free.

It's just too bad there are only 24-hours and three meals in a day, or I'd hit 'em all up. After all, what's better than your birthday? Getting FREE STUFF on your birthday.

Let the celebrating commence....

Nate kicked off my birthday celebration a few hours early by bringing home these beautiful flowers and offering a trip to Starbucks after dinner.

Both gifts were a wonderful surprise...but I have a sneaking suspicion that the Starbucks trip was more about cruising in his new ride than celebrating the birth of his darling wife....